GOP panic

On Tuesday, Democrat Travis Childers won a special election to Congress from Mississippi’s First district, one of the most reliably conservative districts in the nation. The win put the Democrats’ record in congressional elections this year at a perfect 3 and 0, causing many insiders to advise Senator John McCain to distance himself from a declining GOP – and President Bush – brand this fall. Since McCain’s policies aren’t doing the job, his best bet is probably actual physical distance between him and the Prez. How to do it? The President is younger and quicker than McCain, so running or bicycling away are probably no good. And Bush can ride a horse, drive a truck, or even fly a plane, so those are all out too. So here’s a little advice for creating that distance – try a jetpack, McCain. You can never go wrong with a jetpack.