Five years

Yesterday marked the 5 year anniversary of America’s War in Iraq. That’s some concrete progress we can sink our teeth into. “The world is better!” And it’s hard to see how we’re better off with 4,000 less troops and 500 billion less dollars than we had 5 years ago, but we don’t want to rain on the happy parade.

The 5 year Anniversary is an important occasion however, and attention must be paid. We looked it up, and the traditional gift for five years is wood. You know what a nice gift of wood from us to the Iraqi’s would be? Saying “wooood-n’t you like us to get the heck out of your country?” Or maybe “woooodn’t it be nice if we hadn’t killed so many people trying to fix your own problems for you?”

We think though the best thing we could give the Iraqis is a big wooden sign. One that reads: “Sorry. We tried to do something that we thought would help you. And we screwed it up big time.” Happy Anniversary.