The teenage robber was ordered to write the letter as part of a rehabilitative program, the Yorkshire Post reported.
But the repeat offender showed little sign of regretting his crime.
Instead, he told his victims it was their fault for making their home so easy to break into.
The 16-year-old robber stole a games concole, a camera, a camcorder, two TVs and two speakers from a home in Leeds in northern England, the Post said.
Saying he has been "forced to write this letter," the thief – evidently no penman – writes:
"To be honest I'm not bothered or sorry about the fact that I burgled your house. Basicly [sic] it was your fault anyways."
He then runs through "the dumb mistakes" his victims made, including not closing their curtains at night, leaving a downstairs window open and living in a burglary hot spot.
"I wouldn't do that in a million years," the deliquent scoffs, before concluding:
"I don't feel sorry for you and Im [sic] not going to show any sympath [sic] or remorse [sic]."
Police never delivered the letter, said Chief Inspector Melanie Jones. They decided to publish the "disgusting" missive in order to warn the public about "the cold and dispassionate way burglars select a property to target."
Every day, reporters and producers at The World are hard at work bringing you human-centered news from across the globe. But we can’t do it without you. We need your support to ensure we can continue this work for another year.
Make a gift today, and you’ll help us unlock a matching gift of $67,000!